3 questions better than should

The word should can be problematic in many conversations but especially when you’re working together as a team. Ask these questions instead.

Photo by Ave Calvar on Unsplash

I try to avoid using the word should.

There are worse words in the dictionary, but this word occupies a special place for me.

When I use the word should, as in “I should exercise today…” while I’m sinking into my couch, I’m telling myself something I already know. The word should provides space in the form of an out-of-body self that’s trying to convince the sedentary me to make a better choice. 

What I’m not saying is, “Let’s exercise now,” which starts a train of actions that ends with my completing an exercise routine. The should comes with the weight of obligation but allows me to avoid actually making the commitment.

Judging by the imprint on the middle cushion of my couch, this wishful self-exchange reflects that some part of me has determined exercise is the right choice, but more of me would prefer that I not. Since I believe how we think shapes what we do, eliminating the should would drive better actions (in this case, any action would be an improv…